I've been thinking alot over the weekend about my mild painting obsession and Ive decided to go back to the basics: learn how to 'see' which I guess means staring at things for a very very long time. I think I need to teach my eyes to see in a way that the average person may not be aware of having the capability to do so.
There was a point when I would have frequent daydreams about being Frida Kahlos or Mattises' art assistant: stretching canvases, organising their beautifully chaotic studios, making tea for Henri, and posing for Frida....... but wait-imagine how awful it would be if everything I ever painted started to look like Fridas or Henris? Some might say rather resoundingly But that would be an artists dream! And im sure it would, that is, if I happen to have been, by some strange freak of nature, possessed by their creative genes . The point I'm making, and its a point I made to myself over the weekend, is, why in the world would I want to paint like others when the most original and exciting thing in the world would be to paint like the enigmatic (though far from Great) moi? I see too many paintings that art shouting to be accepted as 'art' particularly online. So I think its time I am more sincere and honest with myself to avoid participating in all that 'noise' and general rush to be accepted. Its all about focusing on what you like, what you know, and accepting what you dont know too.
My habit up until now has been to doodle, look at endless amount of art, both from the past and the present, sketch here and there and then give in to that strange afterwork impulse to just 'paint something'. I'm certainly happy to have excavated a huge array of potential ideas from my tiny brain. All of this painting palaver actually got going this summer, when a little sketch for my boyfriends 3 year old neice, served as a key to a box crammed with ideas. (not all of quality of course, I have a mental sieve at work, doing its best to seperate the interesting from the downright strange...and i have allllooot of them..) I notice that when i look at a particular painting, I find that i mimick them subconsciously or otherwise, thus rendering everything i do afterwards tainted in someway by what I saw.
So I guess Ive decided to go back to nature and do as all students do: learn.
2 comments:
I think you already do have an underlying individual style-- and I think that your resolution to develop that rather than being referential to other artists is a good thing . Take the best from them by all means , but be true to yourself .
Brian
I appreciate your thoughts and advice on this topic Brian
TY :)
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